“Photogenic” is a Dirty Word

Even without being a portrait photographer, I still hate the word photogenic.

Why?

Because of two gigantic reasons.

Reason #1: The Myth of the Chosen Few

“Photogenic” implies there’s a divine society of people blessed by the camera gods who can somehow sneeze, chew, or drool in photos and still look immaculate, leaving everyone else in a separate pile of low expectations and resigned discomfort.

Malarkey. Hogwash. Poppycock and grade-A nonsense.

(Warning: harsh truths ahead.)

Most people use “photogenic” as a synonym for “attractive”. We’ve decided it’s more socially acceptable to say, “I’m not photogenic,” rather than, “I don’t think I’m desirable.” The word jumps out like a reflex. A hall pass for expected disappointment. We gain the upper hand at being judged by others by preemptively judging ourselves.

But attractiveness is subjective.

It’s also not the goal of being photographed.

We’re not trying to seduce anyone — not even in boudoir or dating profile pictures.

What is the goal? Connection.

Connection is what makes us pause every time and feel there’s something about this person that’s captivating.

What are we connecting with?

A moment…

A client…

A loved one…

Most importantly, self.

I know that connecting with ourselves is one of the most vulnerable and challenging landscapes we can imagine. I know that it’s easier to put on a mask, divert attention, or perform, rather than address what would make us feel safe.

Because under the awkward grin, comical grimace, and stiff shoulders are emotional notes — pain, shame, fear. Fear that you’ll see what you’ve learned to hate seeing. Fear that you may never again see what feels right.

But when we name the fear, and unravel it… what’s left is the truth. Evidence. Proof that we are, in fact, able to connect.

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Reason #2: The Photographer’s Responsibility

Give two people the same ingredients to bake a cake.

One cake turns out mouth-wateringly delicious; the other is an insult to the word dessert. Do you blame the ingredients? Of course not. You question the baker.

Photography is no different.

Every session uses the same “ingredients”: aperture, ISO, f-stop, light. We all have access to tools, from a $13,000 Leica lens to a plastic Polaroid. What separates a masterpiece from mediocrity isn’t the subject, it's the alchemy — and yes, alchemy implies a little bit of magic.

Just as a baker knows how butter interacts with sugar, a photographer understands how atmosphere influences emotion. How to blend mannerisms and tenderize mood. How to fold in laughter with movement, and bake at the right temperature of trust. And it doesn’t matter if we follow a recipe, because it’s you that will always bring a new flavor of magic.

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Using “photogenic” is just camouflage for fear, and fear can be healed. That’s why I call myself the heart surgeon using a camera lens instead of a scalpel — helping to heal or remove fear is a life-nourishing critical part of my job.

So no, you’re not "unphotogenic." There’s no such thing. Replace those words with, “I haven’t been photographed in a way that feels like me, yet,” because you’ve just been in kitchens where the baker didn't work with your flavor. And for the record, humbly… I make a mean cake.

If this resonated with you, read next: “I Will Never Shoot You” — A Portrait Photographer’s Perspective on How the Violent Language of an Industry That Celebrates Being Seen Also Cultivates the Urge to Hide

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★ written without AI

“Spider” Meka Hemmons is an international portrait photographer, speaker and visual consultant based in Chicago. She helps heal trauma around being photographed and disrupts the beauty industry with her perspective on vanity and deep-rooted messaging. Check out her Streams of Silk podcast and newsletter.

Cover Photo by Darius Bashar